I know it's been a long time since I posted, and part of that was the Christmas wind-down, but not long after that, Eleanor the laptop actually crashed on me and had to spend some time in repair. The brightside is that $200 later, it's in fine working order, I didn't have to reinstall a single thing, and I actually have a bigger hard drive than what I started with! I also immediately went and uploaded my writing to two independent file storage sites so I can access my writing even without Eleanor.

Christmas was pretty awesome - I got cash from the grandparents, as usual, but I also got an iPod case from Shannon and Season 2 of Castle on DVD from Lauren. My parents, however, went on eBay and got me a vintage 2nd edition copy of a Little Golden Book my mom used to read to us when we were kids. Since I collect antique books, this was actually an awesome gift. Now all I need to find is the 1980s reprint, since that was the one we actually owned, and I'll have the Katie the Kitten exacta. (How weird does that sound?) Considering that Katie the Kitten isn't in print anymore, this would be awesome.

Speaking of Christmas, even though I said I was almost Christmas-ed out, I managed to paint six ornaments for a pastor friend, who just adopted a little girl. I made one personalized ornament for each member of the family, and on the bottom, where I signed and dated them, I included a heart (since I always sign stuff with a heart) and numbered each in their birth order. They turned out so adorable - I'm so proud of them, and so far I know Joel is jazzed. Then I painted an ornament for a member of the MST3K discussion board I'm on, and he offered to trade me three episode DVDs for it. Last year was my first artistic commission, and this was the first time I've ever been compensated for one of my ornaments. I'm kind of excited about that.

New Year's was cool - I got invited to go to the church's singles event, which was my first singles anything. I'd heard rumors that the group was mostly re-single people, and as a 26-year-old I kind of would rather hang out with people my age than 40-something divorcees. But the improv troupe they brought in was kind of cool, and the stand-ups (Christian stand-ups with real LA credentials!) were hilarious. Then we rang in 2011 with noisemakers and the Cha-Cha Slide. That was interesting... Everybody was nice, and there seemed to be some people my age there - I think I'll keep going and see what happens. I mean, if I can't get a job, maybe I can get a boyfriend, right? :P

In royalty news, the Crown Princess of Denmark had her twins on Saturday - one boy and one girl. In Denmark, nobody knows a child's name until the mother speaks it at the christening, which isn't for about three months. So being an onomastic (one who likes names and what they mean) I get to play the guessing game until about March/April. Until then, some people are calling them Elvis and Shirley, after a joke Crown Prince Frederik made about naming the boy Elvis (since the twins share a birthday with Elvis Presley), and Shirley Bassey, another singer with a January 8th birthday, but I'm calling them Lilleprinsen ("Little Prince") and Lillepigen ("Little Girl"), after the nicknames the Danish press gave their older siblings Prince Christian and Princess Isabella. Regardless, it's a far sight happier news than what really covered the airwaves over the weekend. Also, I found a Swarovski crystal ring that resembles a certain famous British royal engagement ring at the mall and splurged on it for myself. It was only $25, so that's not too bad, and it has two more "diamonds" around the edge than Catherine's, so there. I love wearing it. It's so sparkly.

Finally, I am including a meme I snagged from apple_pathways , which means you finally get to hear my voice!

( Here's the meme: )

I thought I could get through it, then reward myself by cutting it to shreds in a review for my blog. I thought I was untouchable. I mean, I've survived Manos: The Hands of Fate, Monster A-Go-Go, and Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band: The Movie, as well as all manner of badly-written fanfiction. Surely I could survive this.

I was wrong. Oh so very wrong.

And yet completely right, all at the same time.

I thought it would be clever to attempt to read the Twilight series, and do a review of it where I made it clear I tried to have an open mind and see where it went, simultaneously getting a crowd of junior high girls off my back (they declare that I am crazy for hating Twilight and Justin Bieber). But I decided to start with the Amazon.com preview. The book lost me with a flat, awkward conversation about a vintage truck 7 pages in, but then the preview skipped to the epilogue, where Bella, our heroine, utters, "Would I ever get used to his perfection?" I wanted to stop, but I kept reading, which is when she said, "Mostly I dream about being with you forever."

*headDESK*

That's it. I tried, but this book is complete drivel, which means I was right all along: Twilight sucks.

My apologies to any people on my friends list who may like these books, but in my opinion (informed by years of college-level study in literature), you are so much better off reading something else*.

I'll just sit over here with my Shakespeare and my Quirk Classics mashups** and try to forget what I've read. (Actually, I may still do the video, if only because I need more material for my blog.)

*Just not anything by Samuel Beckett. He's full of crap.
**Yes, they are also stupid, but they aren't meant to be taken seriously.

I seriously need to go to bed. My baby sister graduates from high school tomorrow (OMG), and I need to clean my room for the inevitable grandparental invasion.

I had a sweet video all set up, but Windows Movie Maker hates me and my .mov file. So text it is. (Apparently this computer hates embedding images, too. Life can't ever be easy, can it?)

Remember how a few weeks ago, I mentioned how I had managed to get involved in a new marketing idea with a publisher – today is the day! For the last two weeks, bloggers all over the net have been reading and writing reviews of the hot new release from Quirk Classics, and today they’ll be sharing their reviews with you. Stay tuned at the end of the review for information about the book and a chance to win fabulous prizes!

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: Dawn of the Dreadfuls introduces us to the Bennets, who have found themselves face to face with an unmentionable. The return of the undead awakens an old oath that Mr. Bennet had taken before marrying – that he would train his children to be warriors to defend England – and so he cleans out his dojo and starts training his five daughters to fight. But the idea of young ladies taking up the deadly arts doesn’t sit too well with the people of Meryton. So as corpses start poking their undead heads above ground once more, Jane and Elizabeth must leave their genteel lives behind and start taking action, all while navigating the affections of the men around them. It’s love and war in Hertfordshire in Dawn of the Dreadfuls.

I was excited to hear about a prequel to Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (or PPZ for those keeping score at home). The Bennet sisters were so cool that I wanted to read more about them and the idea of seeing how they became warriors was too good to pass up, especially the chance to see proper English ladies playing Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. I pictured a training montage with the girls trying harder and harder and eventually growing strong enough to take on the undead hordes and set to “You’re the Best Around” from The Karate Kid.

Unfortunately, I think the sequel rule comes into play here. Yes, it’s a prequel, but the second title is often unable to match the level of the first. One reason why is that this was written by a different author. Seth Grahame-Smith left Quirk Classics after PPZ, and so this book, written by Steve Hockensmith, obviously has a different voice and style. This is an original story that uses Grahame-Smith’s world and Austen’s characters, and so it’s different enough to be noticeable, but not necessarily in a bad way. Jane Austen isn’t even listed here as a co-author, even though they’re her characters.

This book’s tone is more modern than the other Quirk Classics mashups. PPZ had retained much of Austen's language, even in the zombie scenes. Here we have a looser style. It’s almost not even a “true” mashup, since this is a completely original story with Austen's characters... like an ascended fanfiction of sorts. The modern tone lends itself well to casual reading. The first time I read PPZ, I had a hard time navigating Jane Austen’s polite, almost formal language (I hadn’t read Pride and Prejudice before, and I don’ think it’s necessary to), and I had to read it twice just to figure out all the nuances. I didn’t have that problem this time.

Actually, this book left me with a few issues. It may be Hockensmith’s attempt to give us characters that have some growing to do in order to get to where they are in PPZ, but Lydia is downright vile, especially to Mary, and Mr. and Mrs. Bennet have been downgraded from snarky bickerers to barely talking to each other. It also doesn’t seem to dovetail neatly into PPZ. There are some unanswered questions and a character or two that don’t get resolutions that also don’t exist in PPZ – unless they become some manky dreadful Elizabeth dispatches in the next book.

At this point, I feel the need to qualify my review. I love PPZ. It’s one of my favorite books. So naturally I can’t help but compare Dawn of the Dreadfuls to its predecessor. In fact, I was worried that I was being too picky when I started to read this book and found all these criticisms I had (I’ve even left out a few things because I was afraid they would be too spoilery). But as a reviewer, I can do little else but offer my honest opinion.

If I were to have read this on its own – without having PPZ, or even the task of writing a review, in mind – I have little doubt that I would find it a good read. The action is quite fun - as much fun as PPZ - and Hockensmith does a good job of getting into the minds of his characters, especially Lizzy, Mary, and Lord Lumpley. You get a real sense of how the Bennet sisters grow and learn how to become warriors. I easily pictured everything in my head, almost played out like a film - which for me, represents a very visual style. The illustrations don’t hurt either (this time they look like woodcuts or engravings).

Put together with PPZ into one massive Regency-Era zombie-fest, Dawn of the Dreadfuls plays the part of the slow rise of the first hill of the rollercoaster, where you sit in your car looking around and wondering what the rest of the ride holds for you, while the ominous click-click-click warns of what’s to come. PPZ then becomes the rest of the coaster with the twisting and turning action that gets your heart racing and your arms searching for something to hold on to as you’re tossed around. And Dawn of the Dreadfuls needs to be quieter, I think. The characters all have their growing up to do, and, as the Bennets show us, you have to train and train and do laps around the dojo and dand-baithaks (no, I'm not telling; read the book!) until your arms fall off before you can become a warrior. You have to deal with some idiots before you meet a Mr. Darcy, and you need to have one lone unmentionable before you can have all-out Zombie Armageddon.

I give this book 3 and a half out of 5 stars and recommend it to anybody who has enjoyed the other books from Quirk Classics. And a note to those, like me, who think they might be picky, just read it with an open mind.

But don’t take my word for it! (Hee. Reading Rainbow for the win. I’ve wanted to say that since I don’t know how long.)

For more information, visit Quirk Classics' Dawn of the Dreadfuls page.

And now, the payoff for sitting through my review: you - yes, you! - can be one of fifty winners of a Quirk Classics Prize Pack! It includes:

• An advance copy of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: Dawn of the Dreadfuls
• Audiobooks of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters
• A password redeemable online for sample audio chapters of Dawn of the Dreadfuls
• An awesome Dawn of the Dreadfuls poster (I have one - it's pretty cool!)
• A Pride and Prejudice and Zombies journal
• A box set of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies postcards (if you win, please send me one! It’ll be the piece de resistance of my collection!)

To enter, click here, which'll take you to a public message board post where you can discuss how anxious you are for the book. Please mention my blog ("Deum, Vitam, Litteras Amemus" aka the title of my LJ), and the prize pack, retailing at more than $100, can be yours!

Thanks to Quirk Classics for the book and all the fun, and look for another review later in the spring for Quirk Classics' next release: Android Karenina, coming summer 2010!