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The downside to bringing a hand fan to a wedding: being asked by one of the flower girls twice if she could have it. I would have let her see it and play with it if I knew the girl and could thus ensure that I'd see it again. Sure, it cost me $4 at Cost Plus, but it was hard to find a fan in a color I liked that had a loop at the bottom for a ponytail holder-turned-wrist strap. Eventually I had to put it away to prevent being accosted again (I was starting to feel bad even though her mom really should have been keeping a better eye on her to keep her from repeatedly bothering strange ladies) and switch to using a paper plate from the dessert table.
*There will be no sappy father-daughter song at my hypothetical future wedding. I'll probably already be an emotional wreck, so I want as few opportunities for me to cry as possible. Plus, my dad doesn't really dance, so I'll want to make it the least taxing thing out there.
Writer's Block: Band on the run
I love "Band on the Run," "Live and Let Die," and "Eleanor Rigby," but mostly "Birthday," because today is also my birthday, so I can honestly say "They say it's your birthday/It's my birthday too, yeah."
A Ribbon of Red: 1536 - 1793 - 2011
Countless fathers, lovers and friends
Cut down by a bloody Reign of Terror
Lives run down to the streets below
In a ribbon of red
Madame is still, the cruel powers satisfied
An uneasy peace finally descends
We wore their memories around our necks
In a ribbon of red
Centuries past, the nineteenth of May
A Queen kneels before abused injustice
A sword’s swift blade ends an innocent life
In a ribbon of red
On this day, to honor the fallen Queen
An ancient custom sees a new day
I wear her memory around my neck
In a ribbon of red
Every year I try to mark Anne Boleyn's death on May 19 by doing something. This year, other projects kept me busy until today, so I couldn't do anything ambitious, and my current temp job (seriously, I'm constantly working this year!) gives me all sorts of time to do nothing but sit around when the phone's not ringing. (If only they let me surf the internet during that time.) So I wrote a poem. This is the same reason why I wear a red ribbon on February 12, but Anne was the principal catalyst to my sartorial tradition.
For more on the significance of the red ribbon, read Wikipedia's entry on the Bals des victimes.
This, to me, is the definitive version of the events of May 19, 1536. The details were glossed over, but the impact is so strong that it makes up for everything else.
I'm bored.
What am I doing now that I can post? Sitting in the jury room at the county courthouse. I got called in today, and they're selecting for a six-week trial. (Yikes.) So a bunch of people (myself included) filled out I-have-an-honest-hardship-please-don't-pick-me-for-this questionnaires, and I think they're still sorting through them. I missed out on the first round of excusals, but hopefully I can get excused today. I really don't want to have to call my temp job and tell them I have to be back tomorrow. They already didn't like the fact that I had to be here today with Tax Day on Monday. Praise the Lord the court has wi-fi.
Now we're just sitting around doing absolutely nothing. The jury admin guy hasn't said anything in close to an hour and a half. I've spent most of the day watching last year's Eurovision Song Contest and creating a drinking game. Give singers an international stage and millions of viewers and have them try to win a singing contest, and tropes will appear. The Fan of Added Drama and Key Change of Added Drama, to give a few examples. Gimmicky costumes also tend to show up every once in a while, as does what I call "alleged English," which is when you get non-native English speakers writing or translating songs into English to try and get a bigger international audience and not bothering to have native English speakers edit it. Belarus' song last year is so chock full of alleged English (and really thick accents) that I can't make out more than about 80% of the words. (Note the use of gimmicky costumes; also, "heartfully" is not a real word. The fun is that what they sing is only about an 80% match of the lyrics posted online. I think.)
***
Luckily, the jury admin guy started reading off names not long after I started writing this, and I got excused from the selection and released for the day. So I called Temp Job and offered to come in, but I'd only be in for 2 hours, so the office manager told me to just not bother. So I got a full day off of work in the busiest week of tax season. No, I won't be paid for it, but I needed the mental health break. I do not know how they do this every year.
Quick bragging post
So for every quiz you pass, your certification title (C.R.E.) goes up a level - Lord, Baron, Viscount, Earl, Duke, Prince, Grand Duke, King, and then finally Emperor.
I made Emperor last night - one of the first two to do so.
So I'm now officially a Certified Royal Expert - Robyn H., E.C.R.E.
Feel free to ask me anything. :D (Especially stuff involving ribbons, orders, sashes, and the minutiae surrounding the British Royal Wedding - I wrote those quizzes.)
*Only princesses by blood can put the title Princess before their names, like The Princess Anne (daughter of the Queen) or Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie of York (daughters of the Duke of York, a male-line descendent of the Queen). (The titles of the children of Prince Edward is a whole 'nother can of worms.) Princesses by marriage hold their title in right of their husbands, and so take their husband's title. Unless the Queen gives William a royal peerage (Duke/Earl of Someplace) - in which case Kate would be HRH The Duchess/Countess of Someplace - she will be HRH Princess William of Wales.
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While I love Anne Boleyn, and she's probably my favorite historical figure, Lady Jane Grey is one of my heroes. Sure, she didn't do much - she was abused by her parents and treated as little more than a political pawn - but she rose above her beginnings and proved she had an iron will time and again.
Jane was the eldest daughter of Henry Gray, the Duke of Suffolk. (This duke was the son-in-law of Charles Brandon of The Tudors fame. This made Jane the great-niece of Henry VIII and first cousin once-removed to Henry's children.) She was a brilliant girl, and became one of the best-educated women of her day. Her parents, possibly disappointed over never having any sons, or because they saw the bookish Jane as weak, were constantly abusive to her. Tradition holds that she had to be beaten severely before she would give in to the idea of marrying Guildford Dudley, son of the Duke of Northumberland (this was part of Northumberland's plan to cement his hold on power among the King's Council, and contrary to what you may have seen in Lady Jane, Guildford was a bit of a spoiled mama's boy.)
She became queen because of some poltical hoop-jumping by King Edward VI and his council, who did not want to see the Catholic Mary come to the throne despite the fact that Henry VIII's will was iron-clad, and as the eldest daughter, Mary would follow her brother to the throne. After Edward's death at the age of 15, Jane was proclaimed Queen and moved to the Tower of London, where all Kings and Queens of the time stayed before their coronation. She never left. Nine days later (thirteen after the death of Edward), Mary had gathered the support of most of the country and rode into London in triumph, and Jane was officially a traitor and usurper of the crown.
Realizing that the whole thing was not Jane's idea at all, Mary initially intended to spare her cousin, but when a Protestant rebellion sprung up over the issue of Mary's wildly unpopular desire to marry the King of Spain, Jane became a political liability. It was never the goal of Wyatt's Rebellion to restore Jane to the throne, but Mary could not risk having a prominent Protestant so close to the throne - Jane had to die.
First, however - either to remove her as a viable Protestant alternative or to save her from the Protestant heresy before her death - Mary sent a Catholic theologian to convert Jane. Even though she knew it would mean her death, Jane refused to abandon her Protestant faith. She even debated Catholic priests on theology - and this was at a time when women were expected to keep silent in matters of religion.
On February 12, 1554, they came for Jane. (Guildford had been executed just an hour or so before.) She had with her only a few ladies, and Dr. Feckenham, the Catholic priest who had been sent to convert Jane, but befriended her instead. Famously, after blindfolding herself, Jane was unable to find the executioner's block and became flustered. With a helping hand, she stretched out across it and died with one blow of the axe. She was 16.
Jane was a quiet, studious girl with a whip-smart mind who much preferred studying to anything else, and she was a devout Protestant who refused to change her beliefs, even when her very survival was at stake. As a modern-day nerdy Christian girl, you can understand why I admire her so. I pray that I'm never put in Jane's position, but if I am, I also pray that I can have the same resolve.
I wear black today in Jane's memory (as well as on May 19 to honor Anne Boleyn), with a red ribbon choker reminiscent of the post-revolution French fashion to memorialize those killed by the guillotine. It's the least I can do to honor my hero.
A more beautiful telling of Jane's life and death can be found here, at one of my favorite history blogs.
"Packers won the Super Bowl!"
Because then I could share this with all my friends.
OMG I'm such a geek.
For me, the Super Bowl is one of the few events that I have to be somewhere else to fully enjoy (preferably in a house crammed to the gills with people and yummy snacks) so it's a good thing that Shannon and I got a last-minute invite. We hung out with a bunch of Newgen leaders, which was a lot of fun, especially when some of the guys started taking pictures of various body parts (ears, eyes, tonsils, bellybuttons - remember, we're all church youth leaders) and texting them to each other. Oddly enough, though, just about everyone was rooting for the Packers, except for one guy who has to be contrary, and the pastor's youngest son, who idolizes Mr. Contrary, and wanted to root for the Steelers, too. All in all, it was probably the best Super Bowl party I've been to in a while.
Packers - Woooo!
All dressed up with nowhere to go
We're still at Armine's, so I got all ready and headed out. It was super foggy, and there was more traffic than I bargained for - and I was in our crappy car, so I couldn't see - and for some reason, I was running late. I even budgeted to leave five minutes early, but somehow ended up leaving the house a few minutes late. I couldn't even get off Armine's street, so I called my agency to let them know I wasn't going to make it on time.
And then they told me I wasn't even supposed to be in yet.
Because the CPA office I'll be temping at requires a background check, I couldn't go in until it checked out.
And because I couldn't see in the fog to make a U-turn, I had to make a big loop around and back to Armine's house. My background check went through later in the afternoon, so I'll start Wednesday.
And in the meantime, I've been stuck here all day without a car (Shannon took the car we had here as soon as she knew she didn't have to stay here), and I've been watching Say Yes to the Dress and Doctor Who all day on Netflix and getting serious cabin fever. And I get to do it all again tomorrow, since Lauren's got school, and Shannon will probably still find some excuse to stay away from here. We're all getting fed up with the Schnauzers.
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So starting Monday, I get to work 8-and-a-half hour days, and 6 days a week once they hit extended hours at the beginning of February (with a Saturday off every so often). And in my perverse indecisiveness, now I wish I didn't have 4 months of all this work ahead of me. Hence yesterday's post about chasing dreams. The more I chase after a full-time job and all that it promiese (health benefits and the ability to move out and get my own car), the more I wish I could just sit around and write. It's what I enjoy, and it's something that I never seem to have time to do while I'm temping (even though working at the last temp job gave me plenty of time between phone calls; the new temp job will have me working alongside someone, so no free time). But of course I said yes, because like I'm going to interview for a job and then say no, especially if they made the snap decision like that. The money should be good, though. Maybe I'll be able to get a car this summer after all.
I've got the rest of this week, though, to figure stuff out, as I'll be at Armine's house watching the Schnauzers (again). I love how it's just assumed that I'll do it, even though with all the places everybody has to be at (new temp job notwithstanding), and only two cars between us, it's going to be crazy - and expensive with all the gasoline we'll be spending getting places. Tomorrow is bad, with Lauren having two classes tomorrow - one in the morning and one in the evening - me having church tomorrow night, and Shannon working all day, we had to piece together a game of Musical Cars just to get everything worked out. And since Armine and family won't be back from Massachusetts until Wednesday, taking me and one car out of the equation Monday and Tuesday is only going to complicate things. And of course the dogs can't be/have never been alone for more than a few hours, and having Shannon and Lauren not know their work schedules until Thursday (of course Lauren has school), it's all up in the air and Hrayr is worried about who's going to watch the dogs. (I submit they'll be fine. I doubt they'll start destroying the house as soon as the four-hours-alone mark is reached, especially if someone is there to take them outside beforehand.)
Argh. At least staying at their house Monday and Tuesday will put me significantly closer to my new job for two days. Right now, though? I need The Middleman. Maybe MST3K. And maybe even some Eurovision Song Contest before bed. I have to be up at the ungodly hour of 4:30 am to drive with Dad to Armine's, so he can pick them up for the airport and drop me off without having to make an extra trip, otherwise I'd be there right now.
There was something supremely cool today, but more about that when the pictures are available for download. :-)
With apologies to Tom Dice...
Girl, you are in too deep
But I'm not afraid to chase my dreams,
Just me and my stories
And no one may ever know
The feelings inside my mind
'Cause all of the lines I ever write
Are running out of time
So maybe I should get a nine to five
But I don't want to let it go, there's so much more to life
Tell me that I’ve got it wrong
Tell me everything will be okay
Before I fall
Tell me they'll read my lines
Tell me they'll feel the words I say
When darkness falls
All of the stars will see
Just me and my stories
I'm sure that I'll find my way
'Cause I'm not afraid to try
Even a world of love and hope can't guarantee that prize
So maybe I should get a nine to five
But I don't want to let it go, there's so much more to life
Tell me that I've got it wrong
Tell me everything will be okay
Before I fall
Tell me they'll read my lines
Tell me they'll feel the words I say
When darkness falls
All of the stars will see
Just me and my stories
Me and my stories...
And it's only fair that if I'm going to co-opt his lyrics, you should hear the original:
I clearly don't know how to dress for success
A downside of temping is constantly having to go interview at places - I don't begrudge them the wish to pick their long-term temp, but I hate always having to interview. And at places with such disparate dress codes. The last place I temped, I could get away with a cute top and slacks - I was at the front desk and Miss First Impression while everybody else wore whatever the heck they wanted. Jeans, hoodies - and in the case of one customer service rep, all of her back-of-the-neck tattoos visible every Casual Friday.
I have an interview on Tuesday at an accountant's office that is looking for some tax season help, also at the front desk. Sort of like last year at the grandparents', but local. And the guy at my temp agency, in his cute Australian accent (seriously - what makes a guy decide to leave Australia and come to Modesto?), told me specifically to wear a skirt and nylons, and now I'm at a loss. Everybody on their website is wearing full-on professional suits, and I've never had cause to wear anything that professional.
I think I'm going to just suck it up, be like Donna Noble and Wendy Watson, and buy a proper suit. Hopefully Ross or T.J. Maxx will have one, because I can't afford anything from the mall. I already own a black blazer, but I've never thought the way it fit was very professional looking - more boyfriend-y, if that makes any sense. Slightly oversized and floppy, if that helps explain. The other blazers I own are either too casual (khaki corduroy) or far too theatrical looking (pink-and-yellow brocade). Mom wants to offer me her blazers, which are all very 90s and motherly and not my style, though the royal blue one did make me think of Greg Lee from Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?
Thank goodness for this site. I'm starting to get some ideas... but it's time for bed. I've got all weekend to hash this out.
Out of the dark...
Christmas was pretty awesome - I got cash from the grandparents, as usual, but I also got an iPod case from Shannon and Season 2 of Castle on DVD from Lauren. My parents, however, went on eBay and got me a vintage 2nd edition copy of a Little Golden Book my mom used to read to us when we were kids. Since I collect antique books, this was actually an awesome gift. Now all I need to find is the 1980s reprint, since that was the one we actually owned, and I'll have the Katie the Kitten exacta. (How weird does that sound?) Considering that Katie the Kitten isn't in print anymore, this would be awesome.
Speaking of Christmas, even though I said I was almost Christmas-ed out, I managed to paint six ornaments for a pastor friend, who just adopted a little girl. I made one personalized ornament for each member of the family, and on the bottom, where I signed and dated them, I included a heart (since I always sign stuff with a heart) and numbered each in their birth order. They turned out so adorable - I'm so proud of them, and so far I know Joel is jazzed. Then I painted an ornament for a member of the MST3K discussion board I'm on, and he offered to trade me three episode DVDs for it. Last year was my first artistic commission, and this was the first time I've ever been compensated for one of my ornaments. I'm kind of excited about that.
New Year's was cool - I got invited to go to the church's singles event, which was my first singles anything. I'd heard rumors that the group was mostly re-single people, and as a 26-year-old I kind of would rather hang out with people my age than 40-something divorcees. But the improv troupe they brought in was kind of cool, and the stand-ups (Christian stand-ups with real LA credentials!) were hilarious. Then we rang in 2011 with noisemakers and the Cha-Cha Slide. That was interesting... Everybody was nice, and there seemed to be some people my age there - I think I'll keep going and see what happens. I mean, if I can't get a job, maybe I can get a boyfriend, right? :P
In royalty news, the Crown Princess of Denmark had her twins on Saturday - one boy and one girl. In Denmark, nobody knows a child's name until the mother speaks it at the christening, which isn't for about three months. So being an onomastic (one who likes names and what they mean) I get to play the guessing game until about March/April. Until then, some people are calling them Elvis and Shirley, after a joke Crown Prince Frederik made about naming the boy Elvis (since the twins share a birthday with Elvis Presley), and Shirley Bassey, another singer with a January 8th birthday, but I'm calling them Lilleprinsen ("Little Prince") and Lillepigen ("Little Girl"), after the nicknames the Danish press gave their older siblings Prince Christian and Princess Isabella. Regardless, it's a far sight happier news than what really covered the airwaves over the weekend. Also, I found a Swarovski crystal ring that resembles a certain famous British royal engagement ring at the mall and splurged on it for myself. It was only $25, so that's not too bad, and it has two more "diamonds" around the edge than Catherine's, so there. I love wearing it. It's so sparkly.
Finally, I am including a meme I snagged from
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( Here's the meme: )
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Now that I hear there are plans for a Despicable Me sequel, I would actually see that movie in theaters if they were to write this mysterious woman into the script/evil syndicate infrastructure. I just need to figure out who to address the letters to.
***
Christmas is fast approaching, and I'm nearing the finish line of the Advent-ivity Calendar. Tomorrow should be simple - I've got four hours of temping to do, and then all I have to do is film tomorrow's video. I still have one more gift to make, and another to buy (unless Mom & Dad are buying it, and it's from the whole family), but now that I've made one bracelet, making another shouldn't be too difficult - plus I don't need to gift those until Christmas Eve. I'm hoping to film Christmas Eve and Day's videos at the same time, and then I'll be done. This has been the Martha Stewart-est Christmas I have ever attempted, and while it's been fun, it's driving me up the wall. I'm seriously debating whether to do another 25 activities next year, or try something different. It might depend on what the work situation is like.
At any rate, now I really get why people are frazzled at Christmas. Today I had plans to get stuff done, and then I found out we were meeting my dad's parents tonight for Christmas dinner at Applebee's - and I still had to make Nana's gift! So I struggled with the aforementioned bracelet for at least an hour. Jewelry wire can be finicky. And in the end it was gorgeous, but really long. It fell right off my hand, and Nana could just get her hand through. So I ended up taking the bracelet back home, and I'll remake it after Christmas... Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas. I wouldn't put in this much effort if I didn't. But at this point, this is my favorite Christmas song.
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It's going to be a little awkward, though, because I didn't know her at all - we'd only been introduced a time or two. Here's where it gets kind of complicated. My uncle's first wife divorced him and then married another guy, with whom she had two children. It was one of her younger daughters that died; my cousin's half-sister.
How do you prepare for this? Not just having to bury a middle schooler, but to attend the funeral? I haven't been to many funerals, but the ones I have been to have been for people I knew. Do you still wear black if you're not in mourning? I had thought of wearing Madeline's favorite color, but my cousin is understandably not answering Facebook right now. I had originally thought we shouldn't go, but Mom really wants to, and I do agree with supporting Amanda and her family. (The internet seems to agree with Mom: "Always go to the funeral.") But now I'm caught up in the minutiae of it all, as I'm very much into doing things properly, and I want to be respectful.
Maybe a simple blouse and pencil skirt. Can't go wrong with those. Unfortunately, I love to dress in bright colors and patterns - hardly anything in my closet is subdued - and none of those would be appropriate. Can anybody help?
Why am I still awake?
I don't think I've talked much about it here, but I've got myself a new project: an advent calendar podcast. Similar to Grant's Advent Calendar, but different in that I've got all sorts of activities planned for the 25 days until Christmas. Today was supposed to be putting up decorations. Except once I found my decorations and got them up (and my room cleaned, seeing as the entire internet was going to see my room), the night slipped away and it was almost midnight - my sort-of unofficial posting deadline. And while I'm filming my post, my camera battery dies. I quickly ran over to grab my iPod touch, hoping to use that camera instead. Except I forgot that it, too, died today. I ended up using my cell phone to take still shots instead.
And then I remembered that I still had laundry in the washer.
So it's drying now, and I have to wait for it, because if I let it sit overnight, all my nice work clothes will get horribly wrinkled. Not that it really matters, because tomorrow's Casual Friday and my last day at Temp Job, but still. And after going to bed at midnight since September, I'm crashing hard at 1:30 am when I used to be able to stay up until 3 or 4 in the morning.
So I'm going to go check on my laundry, and please go take a look at my advent-ivity calendar and make all my trouble tonight worthwhile. :)
The room does look nice, though, and I got to watch MST3K ("Santa Claus") while I decorated and cleaned.
And my laundry's done, so I am so going to bed.
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Instructions:
1. write down every letter of your name.
2. then type a song that pops up in your mind in each letter of your name as the first letter.
count the letters of your name, and tag that many people.
R -- Reel Around the Sun - Riverdance
O -- One Normal Night - Addams Family Original Broadway Cast
B -- Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen
Y -- You're the Reason - Antigone Rising
N -- Never Let You Go - Jakaranda
Since some of these are rather obscure, I've included YouTube links.
And now I tag
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Writer's Block: Two words: Charlie Brown
One word: MST3K.
The show debuted on Thanksgiving 1989, and so "Turkey Day" has forever been linked with the show. Comedy Central would air 30-hour Turkey Day marathons, complete with special bumpers and segments featuring Dr. Forrester trying to take over the world before pie was served, and deal with unwanted guests from movies he's inflicted on the Satellite of Love gang.
Here's a collection of some of the best bumpers.
It's now tradition among MSTies to spend Thanksgiving watching an episode or seventeen. I usually load up some episodes on my iPod and watch while we drive to the family dinner. This year it might be Jack Frost and Hamlet. Maybe Invasion of the Neptune Men, too, if the weekend gets super boring.
Having it both ways
Everybody says you can't, right?
So why is it that Christmas can be at the same time "too religious" and "too commercialized to the point of complete disassociation from its religious roots?"
Temp job is having a Christmas holiday party next month, and I was asked to make the box for the employees to drop their RSVPs into. So I did. I wrapped it up and put a big sign on it that said "RSVP to the Christmas Party," because I was asked to make a sign for the Christmas party. I didn't question. I just made it.
Today I find out that - after a week of it being on display for the whole office to see - someone complained about the fact that I wrote "Christmas" instead of "holiday." So I was told that we "couldn't be religious" and asked (at least it was done nicely) to redo the sign (I also ended up ripping the tissue paper the box was wrapped in - grrr), and now it's finally sanitized for mass consumption.
So Christmas is too Christian, and we need to avoid using it. But people of all walks (I've heard this even from atheists) complain that Christmas is so focused on commercial crap that it's gotten away from its Christian/pagan/ancient-break-up-the-mid-winter-monotony roots. So what's the average person to do? I'm not even thinking about religious observances here, just general parties and gift/card exchanges. (Speaking of which, I'm getting on the bandwagon on that, but that doesn't belong in a rant.)
So, I know it's not even Thanksgiving yet, but in the spirit of kind brotherhood and platonic internet-friendship - and more than a little bit of rebellion - even if you look at December 25th as just another Saturday, Merry Christmas.
This message is not endorsed by the employees of Insert Robyn's Current Temp Job Here, or anybody else, really, probably even all the way up the United States Government, to be completely honest (did you see Obama's Christmas tree last year?), but I hope there are some people that agree with me.
(Also on the topic of Christmas, I get to see Trans-Siberian Orchestra on Saturday! It shall be amazing.)